The Greatest Day of All

Saturday May 29, 2010
144 days since accident
121 days in Colorado

It was a beautiful day today - the sun was shining, the temperature was mild, about 75 degrees, and my husband decided to wash our cars and his motorcycles. Dad heard all the noise outside and decided to sit on the front porch and watch Larry work.

I really don't know how it happened because I was not outside, but my father ended up on the back of Larry's Harley. Yes, you heard that correctly - my almost-90-year-old father was on the back of a motorcycle cruising around the neighborhood.

At first, I was shocked and speechless. Did my husband go mad? What possessed him to take such a risk? And darn it, why didn't he get pictures and video of the experience?

Look, of course I was freaking out at first, dad can barely walk, and here he is on the back of a motorcycle? Bottom-line, I trust my husband. If he felt it was safe than I am fine with it. I want my dad to have as many new experiences as he can tolerate.

At nearly 90, dad has barely lived at all. I don't know if this is due to the guilt he has over surviving the Holocaust, while his family did not. I suspect guilt was partly to blame, but I also think dad never had anyone in his life to expose him to different experiences. It also didn’t help that my father was, and still is, one of the cheapest men on the planet!

Ok,I really shouldn't be so hard on him - Dad was poor growing up and equally poor when he came to the U.S. Making $75.00 per week, dad worked as a tailor, in a sweatshop on Manhattan's lower eastside; mom didn't work; she was a homemaker and mother of four girls.

Even when dad had extra money, he never used it on himself. I think he was always afraid that he would need the money for a rainy day. I, on the other hand, believe that life is something to experience and not observe. And that is exactly what I plan to have my father do - I want him to be an active participant, and not some old guy sitting on a park bench watching the world go by.

During the last four months we have tried to make dad as comfortable and happy as can be. So far, he has enjoyed the comfort of modern clothing*, proper fitting shoes, cotton socks, and soft bedding. Dad has experienced IMAX, a 3D movie, bowling, the Body World exhibit, Planetarium, dinner playhouse, concert, and countless culinary experiences.

I hope my father remains healthy long enough for my family to show him what it feels like to be part of a close, fun-loving, great family, who loves him. Everyone needs love, even dads who were not the greatest fathers in the world.

I am so grateful to have had this opportunity to get to know my father because now I can finally let go of all the pain, anger, and resentment of my childhood.




*recall in a much earlier post that dad used to hand wash all his clothing using a washboard! His clothing was about 40 years old and so thin that they actually fell apart in the washing machine, in my house.